Passive Creativity: How to Make Procrastination Your Bitch
As much as we beat ourselves up over it, we all need to take a break every now and then — even we seemingly tireless keyboard-pounding thugs of the creative realm. Writers get a bad rap for break-taking, but let’s face it, for some of us, that’s because we’ve been on break since 1995. (That’s not a break. That’s a protest.)
Some people may SAY they are good at procrastinating, but there’s no procrastinator like a writer. We are professionals at staring at the blank page. We can come up with 501 reasons NOT to write — all of them before we’ve even gulped down our first cup of coffee. Here are three of my tried-and-true favorite procrastination excuses:
· Kids. We’ve all heard this one. If you’ve got kids, there’s NO WAY you have NOT used this excuse. The kids need a bath, the kids need food, the kids have a concert at school. (The kid excuse is brilliant because their needs are never-ending.)
PRO TIP: Those same little succubus hobgoblins that steal your time are also OCEANS full of content ideas! Once, while being a proper mom and allowing my kids time in the Burger King petrie dish (playpen/immune system booster) I saw a kid licking the greasy, sticky floor while his mom sat beside him texting. You can bet your Moleskine notebook I wrote about that shit. And if my own kid were licking anything nearly that disgusting, I would also memorialize the moment forever in ink…after quickly removing his tongue from the floor (of course, I think). So remember, dear writer, kids aren’t an excuse to procrastinate; they are CONTENT.
· Pets. The dog needs a walk. Gotta go to the vet. Fido barfed on the carpet again. All standard excuses. Much like kids, pets have never-ending needs, unexpected problems, and err… unmentionable accidents. Except we’re writers, and you can bet we’re gonna mention them.
PRO TIP: Take Fifi for a stroll, see how Milo does in Pet-o-Rama surrounded by other critters, and by all means, try camping with 3 unruly pooches. Because you know what’s gonna happen? Chaos and content ideas! My pittie once decided to drag me face-first through a fresh pile of his daily deposit as I attempted to pick it up…all because he saw a new neighborhood pup he wanted to play with. He did NOT heel like the properly trained beast he should be. Fun for him, stinky for me, funny story for anyone not lying face-first in dog crap.
· Work. Most of us have to make money to live, eat, be able to Netflix binge, and otherwise function as normal humans. But what does work do? It makes us tired, saps our energy, gobbles up our creativity. Ew. Luckily for us, work also does something else.
PRO TIP: Embrace the treasure trove of characters and content opportunity in your office! Just poke your head over the top of the cubicle farm walls and see what there is to see. I worked with a guy who swore deodorant stones were sufficient to keep his body odor at bay (they were not). What about the lady who is constantly shopping online instead of working? Or the guy who brings his therapy turtle only on Wednesdays? Sure, you may have to hold down a nine-to-five, but while you’re there, keep your eyes open for creative inspiration!
We all need a break from the keyboard now and then. But even when we aren’t butt-in-chair, hands poised above the keys, there are still ways to pique our creativity and get us prepped to pick up our plotlines.
Passive Creativity
‘Procrastination’ sounds so negative.
Even when we’re taking a little break from the keyboard, we can glean nuggets of inspiration from everything that’s going on around us. Watch how the barista flirts with the customer in line, check out the lady who’s sharing a muffin with her dog, imagine what’s going on with the guy who’s chasing his kids through the grocery store. (Y’all know they’re having PB&J for dinner.)
Use your experiences to feed your creativity. Be present, and the ideas will come to you even if (and sometimes BECAUSE) you’re not sitting in front of your computer.
Sometimes our best work comes after a little refresh. I propose, then, that we hereby refuse to call it ‘procrastinating’ and instead refer to it as ‘passive creativity.’
Sample conversation:
Person A: Are you procrastinating again? You really need to work on your novel.
Me: Absolutely not! I’m being passively creative. I’ll be writing tomorrow.
*Disclaimer: If you’ve been passively creating for 5+ years, this does NOT apply to you. Put your ass in the chair and write something.
